Not a nuts idea…

Colleges around the nation have been inspired by the success the University of Florida had years ago in licensing the sports drink “Gatorade” that was invented at the school. 

In our state, New Mexico State University has capitalized on its 1888 Pistol Pete Ale, as well as a recently released product called “Pistol Pete’s Six Shooter Rye.”

This week, Eastern New Mexico University in Portales announced it had developed a branded wine, coffee grind and salsa. The wine, said to be a sweet white variety, is called Eastern Sunrise. First off, not being a fan of white wines except for cooking, I suspect it might have the taste and consistency of Karo syrup. Also, the name suggests it should be enjoyed in the morning — maybe in my Mimosa, but not sipped alone at my breakfast.

The coffee is called “Greyhound Grind,” referencing the school’s mascot. And the salsa is called “Silver Dawg,” again referencing the school mascot.

So here’s my problem, other than wincing at what the wine might taste like. I don’t think grape wine production and wineries are rampant in Roosvelt County. I don’t recall any coffee beans being grown in that part of the state. And I can’t recall ever reading about chile being grown in that area.

So what do they grow around Portales? Peanuts. 

The first peanuts were grown in a field near the old Portales High School in 1914 and production has grown since then. Many of the peanuts grown in the Portales area were shipped to troops during World War II. There are currently at least three peanut producers operating in and around Portales.

So instead of wine, coffee or salsa, how about a Greyhound branded peanut butter?

From ENMU?

I’m going to trademark these following names, just in case ENMU follows my suggestion:

“Gray PeanutButter” (as in Gray Poupon); Fast Dog Peanut Butter; Peanut Butter for your Mutter (okay, really bad); Gray Dog Spread; No Jelly, but not dog poop smelly. Okay, I’ll quit.

I’d invite your suggestions and will give your full credit for your response.

And remember, if the stuff tastes bad, you can always give it to your dog and goof on them while they try to eat it. 

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